81. You think sleep training is bad once… you’ll probably have to do it more than once if you go on vacation, baby gets sick or something else jogs the routine. Yeah. Not fun.
82. Once the baby is mobile, he or she will have lots of bumps and bruises. They’re just unstable. And curious. Bad combo.
83. Nothing is safe. Even baby proofed drawers etc.
84. Husbands will just never understand. Period. They can try. But they just never fully will. Why? They didn’t grow a human in their belly for close to 10 months. They didn’t push something way bigger than the opening that it came out of. They don’t have an automatic food source built into their bodies. They can’t help it.
85. Boys are thrashers. They bang everything against anything and throw everything they can get their hands on, on the floor.
86. As a mom, you will get beat up. Pinched, poked, hit, pushed, bruised, hair pulled, slapped and head butted. I look like I’ve been in a fight every day.
87. When your kid is sick and he’s absolutely miserable, which makes you exhausted, and people say… “it’s good for his immune system” you’re going to want to mentally slap them in the face a few times. Yes I know it’s good to build an immune system but you’re not the one dealing with a sick, uncomfortable, unhappy, fussy kid!!
88. My son puts everything in his mouth. Everything. Paper, dirt, rocks, diapers, cardboard… everything. It’s normal I guess?
89. When they start walking it’s good because they are more independent but bad because they’re constantly falling down and bumping their bodies against everything. Which means more bruises and injuries. I swear he gives me a heart attack every five minutes.
90. Tantrums start early. Brace yourself.
Until next time!
Wow! Can’t believe I made it to part 5!! Well here I go… stuff I’ve realized, learned, was totally surprised by, or needed to reiterate!
62. There’s a new kind of tired in town… it’s called parenthood. Get your coffee. It never… ever… goes away.
63. As a mom, you will hear every tiny sound your baby makes. Your husband, can and will sleep through e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g. Literally.
64. It no longer matters what time you feel like having an adult beverage. Motherhood can drive you insane some days and sometimes taking the edge off is not a bad idea.
65. I’m pretty sure babies know when you’re about to lose your mind. Because then they finally do whatever you wanted RIGHT before… like nap for longer than 5 minutes or not wake up as much at night!
66. I could stare at my son sleeping forever. And not in a creepy way of course. 😉
67. Baby steps. For. Everything… progress, learning something new, a new skill, training/creating new habits, breaking old habits etc.
68. Two steps forward. One step back. Every time. You make total progress, then they regress a little and test the waters… and repeat. I’m pretty sure that’s close to the definition of insanity.
69. There is no right answer. And it will drive you nuts.
70. Overthinking things will also drive you bananas.
71. Consistency is key. Being consistent is important but things will never, ever be consistent. What does this mean? Stick with your routines, use the same verbiage, support and reassurance. But things are ever-changing with babies.
72. You’re not alone. Even though you may feel so frustrated, lost, sad, exhausted, and defeated… you are not alone.
73. Baby giggles cure all.
74. A break without the baby is never a true break for moms. When you get a free moment you’re trying to play catch up – do laundry, dishes, clean, prepare for the next day, make dinner etc. Moms never seem to get breaks.
75. Do what feels right. You can read 1 million articles and they can tell you a different thing each time, but in the end, you just need to do what’s right for you. If you are doing what is supposed to be right according to 10 other people, but yet are feeling completely exhausted, defeated, and your gut tells you this isn’t what you’re supposed to be doing, then it isn’t what you’re supposed to be doing. There’s no use and having a baby that was unhappy and a mommy that is in tears all the time.
76. The dynamic with your {single, married without kids, married but trying} friends will change. That and even those friendships with those that have kids but have different perspectives and parenting styles will change. It gets messy, folks.
77. When your child becomes mobile it is a blessing and a curse. It’s awesome they can occupy themselves more independently, tire themselves out, and move to what they want to move to. But, they get into everything. Everything. Nothing is safe anymore and you better get baby proofing if this is the case!
78. Dads get the best behavior. Moms get the totally unguarded behavior. What do I mean by this? Babies let their guard down more with mommy. With daddy it’s often fun and play time because if the dad is working, they don’t spend as much time together. Also… the fact that their food source is built into mommy definitely doesn’t help sometimes.
79. Having three dogs and a baby is a blessing and a curse. The dogs are protective and the baby gets used to being around animals… but the dogs can be overly protective and also bark at anything and everything. Oh and the amount of fur everywhere is insane.
80. Almost eight months later you’ll still be losing hair. I swear I’m going to be bald with how much I’m losing.
I think this is a good place to stop for now. 😉Thanks for reading and to be continued…!
There’s so much people don’t tell you about the first few months of motherhood with your Little Babe. Can I repeat… SO much. I’m not writing this to be negative about having a newborn, but more to be realistic about what is expected. It’s not all cute matching outfits, strolls in the park, giggles and perfectly staged photos in the most adorable attire!
People say, they don’t want to scare you etc. but I am the type of person that would rather know what I’m about to face! Every person says, “Don’t worry, it gets easier.” But they must know that this doesn’t really help when you’re deep in the trenches of keeping yourself and this newborn alive! C’mon people. Work with me here!
Here are some things that I have learned this far… From birth on. I’m sure this will be a multi-part post – so stay tuned!
1. Labor pains are like no other pains I’ve ever felt. Thank goodness for the epidural. That drug is freaking amazing.
2. When your water breaks, it’s not a small cute little drip – it’s like the flood gates have been opened and you’re gushing fluid in the most uncontrollable, awkward way. There’s no stopping this with a pad, or maybe even diaper.
3. You get poked, prodded and your sense of dignity goes right out the door. You’re fully exposed with people all up in your… You know – areas. The nurses and doctors will just keep coming in an examining everything. Everything.
4. After your water breaks, you shake convulsively and continuously. They say it’s because of the hormones. It is a bit crazy and it makes you feel like you’re constantly having little seizures.
5. When you’re about to start active labor and start pushing, you’ll have at least 4 people in the room not including you and your significant other. They will be setting up, checking you, coaching you and gowning up. It’s slightly worrisome but at that point you just don’t care and you know the end is near.
6. After the baby pops out, it’s the most surreal moment, ever. Not only have you been growing this baby in you for 10 months but he or she is now IN your arms and alive and well. Fingernails, hair, limbs and all!
7. After delivering, there will be someone coming into the room almost every 30minutes to check on you or the baby.
8. After delivering you have to wear these disposable underwear with a gigantic sheet folded in half with two big pads lined up together. Basically a mom diaper.
Let’s be real here, I constantly wonder how I survived my 20’s. I had that ‘Oh sh!t I’m turning 31 soon’ moment today. Reflecting back on my 20’s and all the craziness that took place, made me realize what I learned during that decade of chaos. I’m not going to get into the details of everything but WOW. I believe that there is SO much change during that time. I have asked a number of people for their input and many of the same kept coming up. Again, this is all relative!
From the early 20’s, you’re in college, or graduating college, or maybe you started working after high school. You think, there is really life after my high school bubble?!? Yes, yes there is and darn it now I have to kind of grow up. Kind of. You live on your own and you learn the tango of living with other people besides your family. Having to actually share your space with other people, divvying up household responsibilities, and being held accountable for bills – yikes. Surviving your 21st birthday and the crazy bar/club scene is a pure miracle. Hopefully it wasn’t based from the movie ‘The Hangover’. Bar tabs, eating out whenever and eating whatever were major parts of your spending habits. Random dates, unhealthy relationships, unruly friends, and living life on the edge was a good portion of your syllabus.
Some of you may have continued to graduate school in the mid-20’s, or kept on working but here you see more of a finesse in living on your own. Your relationships may, or may not have improved. But if it’s any consolation, you sure as heck learned a lot the hard way. OR maybe you played it safe. In any event, there is a lot to be learned during the third decade of your life!
1. Start saving. And leave it be.Â
Did I do this? Yes, but I kept taking money out for various expenses. So what am I left with? Not too much! If there’s anything that I’ve learned thus far is that there are SO many unexpected items to pay for that you have to dip into your savings for. In my early 20’s there was no way in hell I had a savings account and an emergency savings account. Maybe I wasn’t the most educated about how to best save my money at that point, but at least I got there eventually… In any event, I would say that putting away at least $5 a paycheck to start. I know college students don’t usually have all the time in the world to work, but every little bit counts. I wish someone made me do this back then! Remember, leave it be and do not touch your savings! (Easier said than done).
2. Take care of your body and mind.
Yet another piece of advice that was not drilled at me. And when I have kids, I will drill this into their brains. Seriously. Being diabetic and susceptible to just about anything and everything, it is imperative to start exercising regularly and eating healthy. Most people eat and drink whatever they please, without the worry of gaining weight or any health risks. Plus not to mention the metabolism is a bit more speedy during those years! Ahhhh the good ‘ol days. Burgers and fries with beers, fried yummy-ness, pasta, bread, sugary things from heaven and eating whatever and whenever I wanted… I dream about this, you know? No… I really do dream of this. Everything in moderation is my motto.
3. Spend more time with family.
Family first. This doesn’t take precedence as much as your friends in your early 20’s. Finding yourself, and your place in your social life seem to be more important. I mean, come on, there are SO many fun things to do. Like… your 21st birthday, discovering every bar possible in your area (and other places), going to Vegas, parties, BBQ’s, organized sports, travel, and places to explore with friends. Yes, everyone does at least some of these and your time gets sucked up by it all. Oh and school and work, that happens too. As the years drift by and we find our place outside of the college scene, we start to see our parents and grandparents getting older. What a concept, I know. But this is often difficult to truly see
4. Get a job… please.
If you haven’t gotten a job yet in your lifetime, please drop what you’re doing and go look for one immediately! This is a subject I could probably rant about for quite a long time. I started working when I was 15 years old and pretty much never stopped except while in high school. I worked during the summers, of course, and throughout college. By your 20’s, it would be not only in your best interest, but everyone else’s, for you to get a job. At this point in your life you should be weaning yourself off of your parents’ payroll. Being able to support yourself, and starting to take responsibility for your finances is an incredibly vital aspect of survival in this world.
5. Take every opportunity to travel.
Life gets crazy, and it gets crazy FAST! If there’s one thing that I wish I did when I was in college, it would be to spend time abroad. This is your chance to spend more time than you’ll (probably) ever be able to in the future, in a foreign country. Experience a new culture, meet new people, and explore the world!
6. Do things for you.
It is so easy to get caught up in doing things for other people – friends, family, whomever. This is the time to be adventurous! Not to mention, the time you’ll be the most resilient to anything. Friends may come and go, relationships come and go, but take the time to build YOU!
7. Take risks (to some degree).
Try out a new sport. Join a club. Go on a weekend outdoors trip with the recreation department. Ask questions. Try new foods. Work in an environment you never thought you’d see yourself in. Try out for a team. Take a class because you’re curious. Study abroad. Ditch the car, and ride the bus. Eat by yourself. Live in a town that you’ve never lived in. Take a job out in a new location. Live in a foreign country. This is the time to try new things! Your resources are at your fingertips!
8. Relationships are fun.
This is your time to see what’s out there before settling down. We learn more about what we want and don’t want in a partner, and in ourselves as well. Meet as many people as possible, go on dates, put yourself out there, get to know someone, fall in love, and just have fun. I remember this time as a time when I was not only getting to really know who I was, but a time that I was figuring out what kind of partner I want. It was a total trial period and by no means was it glorious. I had my share of unhealthy relationships, ones that I didn’t see going anywhere or ones that I just didn’t fully connect with. I stayed with people that didn’t treat me right, and/or I didn’t treat them right. Learning about confrontation in an honest, graceful manner was difficult – especially in matters that I had never brought to the table. It is always uncomfortable.
9. Prioritize.
The easiest thing to do is to do is lose track of yourself and your priorities because there is just SO much going on all the time. That BBQ on the beach with your sounds like so much more fun than great aunt Sally’s birthday. And you’ve got to keep up with the styles – besides, the money in my savings account isn’t going anywhere! Bring it back to your purpose and what you want for your future. Are you doing what it takes to reach your goals and setting yourself up for a good future?
Overall, your 20’s are a time of growth. As people say, you ‘find yourself’. I would have to say that it is 100% true. Have fun, take care of your body and mind, explore the world, and learn from everything!
Nourishing Zen 